embarassment seems to be the main theme in my life.

i've realized that i am really freaked out by my own success. how do i fix this?

life and death

There is so much death surrounding me. and at the same time, so much celebration of life.
people i love losing people they love, people i love bringing new life into the world, people who love each other pledging their lives to one another.
my reality has turned much more serious.
how do i deal with all these things. of course some are joyful and others painful but, i want to give equal attention to both.
if before life was a distant acquaintance, now life is slapping me in the face.
i wish i had some help.